What Mentees (Like Me) Need in a Mentor

My View

I am honored to be in my first year as a superintendent and especially grateful my school board did not insist on assigning me a formal mentor at the start of my service. Instead, the board has allowed me the flexibility to pursue opportunities for mentorship from a variety of sources.

I can’t overstate how much I valued the perspective each colleague from neighboring school districts brought to the table to assist me in my transition from the principalship to the top leadership position in my district.

Based on my experience over the past 12 months, I want to share a few do’s and don’ts for those who are considering mentoring a new colleague in the superintendency. Mentors have the potential to be true assets to the first-time superintendent, offering something much more than another perfunctory relationship.

• Two ears, one mouth. 

As school leaders, we are accustomed to a significant amount of formal and informal speaking. While this is crucial to the job, great mentors are those who allow the mentee to verbalize his or her concerns, worries and questions. Let the mentee tell the story he or she is part of. Listen to the new administrator without immediately jumping in and offering your answer.

• Formal and informal check-ins. 

While establishing formal meetings is a natural function of attempting to get two busy people in the same space at the same time, the new superintendent can be quite overwhelmed by the job’s competing challenges that no principal is asked to address.

Be flexible and willing to schedule appointments outside of school hours. If you don’t hear from your mentee, it is probably because superintendents are deluged by the demands of the job. Informally call or e-mail your mentee to let him or her know you are there to be of help, but don’t necessarily expect a response.

• Pull upon your past, not your present.

I remember a meeting with a mentor early on at which I expressed frustration and difficulty balancing my professional responsibilities with “recharging my batteries” on the weekend.

The mentor attempted to offer advice, but the experiences he recalled were more relevant to one at the end of a career as a superintendent. A mentor should not lose sight of the fact that leading a district and managing board relationships looks markedly different at the end of one’s career, especially when contract renewal is no longer an issue.

Seasoned professionals might be able to tell their boards that they are not readily available via phone or e-mail during the evenings, but a new superintendent attempting to establish a positive rapport with board members cannot make the same request.

• Candor welcome. 

Nothing makes a mentee feel more unsuccessful than hearing a mentor tout his or her successes. This is not an interview with the news media about professional accomplishments. Don’t be afraid to share your mistakes, particularly those committed during your first years on the job.

• Empathize, sympathize and energize! 

These three verbs, either in isolation or in tandem, are helpful emotions for a newcomer in the role to feel after a meeting session. Sometimes, a helpful ear or a reminder that you are doing something right is just what the mentee needs to hear to continue the journey through the first year.